Many of us had this tape recorder/ cassette player, with a button of rewind. That’s what happens when all the blocks you have created to stow away the memories falls down. Everything goes into rewind, and all the noise, music, dialog, sounds, videos start emerging into reality, as if you are there, feeling those moments, living those moments so in reality, which makes you forget what you are now at present. The presence is felt in touch, in smell, in voice, in heartbeat, in breathing, giving away that it is still alive, this moment is alive, and you are you are living it again.
But, why am I living it again? Why are these stowed away memories becoming so real, to feel them? what do they want from me? Or did I leave out some important clues or sounds while packing these memories and setting them apart from me when may be they hold a key to future or present, or my mood swings, or my questions which still remains unanswered. On verge of becoming 30, or on the verge of really becoming who I am and what I want, who I want, where I want. Do these memories hold something or will these memories help me let go of something.
And What if I stashed them away for a reason? Is that reason still valid, or has hit a expiry date long ago? Which I am still not acknowledging. Will knowing the reasons of choices made will help? or let the questions remain as it is and create a alternate universe for myself will be the solution? Wiping the slate clean of what has happened till now, or solving this puzzle piece by piece and then coming to an internal peace? Will this be the answer the key to what I want?
A unexpected rewind button has got triggered with a unstoppable force, which asks for answers, to all the questions which are necessary for growth and peace. Rewind, and you hear it rewinding, with a typical sound, and then it stops at a arbitrary point, from where you hear those sounds and feel those confused emotions of many people at a time, you see something unreal at the moment, but still was real at that moment. Those moments starts unfolding, a puzzle placed one by one in a order which I thought I never knew, it shows colours, in a very hazy format, as if it was some water colour painting. It questions the integrity of the memory, but you feel it and know it has happened. A mysterious place of mind, which opens, a war zone between what I want to believe and what exactly is the truth, which asks for reasons for choices that were made for me, and choices which I made for myself.